the not so perfect beings

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بِسْمِ اللهِ الرَّحْمٰنِ الرَّحِيْمِ

In the name of Allah, the most Gracious, the most Merciful


Distinguished Worshippers of ALLAH, 

Indeed, Almighty ALLAH is the best of Creators.

It's just so interesting to me that after HE, The Most High has made the angels — The Perfect Beings

HE then went on to create humans — The Imperfect Beings

I'm telling you that you and I haven't estimated Almighty ALLAH with an estimation that's due to HIM

Indeed, HE is the best of Creators, The Absolute.

Brothers and sisters in Islam, it has become clear to me that some people do not recognise the danger in themselves as a human being.

It has occured to me that some humans think of themselves as good.

Listen, every human have good and bad in them at different percentages.

There's no human except that they have flaws.

It is impossible to be human and perfect.

That can't exist.

Even the Prophet ﷺ got corrected by Almighty ALLAH more than once in the glorious Qur'an.

So what's with you that you do not seek to overcome the darkness in you?

Why do you walk all over the earth surface, forgetting the evil in you due to the overwhelming goodness in you?

Why has the evil that's been done to you preventing you from rectifying the evil that you have in you?

Why?

And certainly, ALLAH is the Most Forgiving, The Oft-Forgiving, The Most Kind.

Distinguished Worshippers of ALLAH,

I'm Hamidah Abbas, the author of Polygamy Ijma'a.

In today's letter, all I'm here to do is to remind you to protect yourself from the evil inside of humans and to protect humans from the evil inside of you.

The majority of problems that we have in life could be gone if people actually realise that they're humans I.e imperfect.

A lot of people actually forget that they're humans and that's what I'm here to remind you about — that you're a human being. You're a human being. You're a human being. A human. Not a saint. Certainly not a saint. Definitely not a saint and most certainly, not a saint.

Remember that you are human and act accordingly. Safeguard yourself from humans whilst relating with them and safeguard them from you.

Know that Almighty ALLAH hasn't made marriage an obligation from HIS mercy, therefore, know that if you have decided to get married then be prepared to enjoy the good in that person and suffer the evil in them.

Verily, humans aren't angels and verily, you must advocate for yourself and know when/if to stay/leave.

And on your wedding night, do not forget to seek protection from ALLAH for the evil in your spouse.

The Prophet ﷺ said:

“When one of you marries a woman… he should place his hand on her forehead and say:

اللَّهُمَّ إِنِّي أَسْأَلُكَ خَيْرَهَا، وَخَيْرَ مَا جَبَلْتَهَا عَلَيْهِ،
وَأَعُوذُ بِكَ مِنْ شَرِّهَا، وَشَرِّ مَا جَبَلْتَهَا عَلَيْهِ

Translation:
“O Allah, I ask You for her goodness and the goodness You have created within her,
and I seek refuge in You from her evil and the evil You have created within her.”

Reference

  • Sunan Abu Dawud (2160)
  • Sunan Ibn Majah (1918)
  • Authenticated by Shaykh Al-Albani (Sahih)
Please note that in the law of Islam, everything is halal until we find evidence that it's haram.

There's no evidence that the wife can't say the same so here's the version that the wife could say:

She may say:

اللَّهُمَّ إِنِّي أَسْأَلُكَ خَيْرَهُ، وَخَيْرَ مَا جَبَلْتَهُ عَلَيْهِ،
وَأَعُوذُ بِكَ مِنْ شَرِّهِ، وَشَرِّ مَا جَبَلْتَهُ عَلَيْهِ

Translation:
“O Allah, I ask You for his goodness and the goodness You have created within him,
and I seek refuge in You from his evil and the evil You have created within him.”

Ruling

  • This is not a prophetic narration, but permissible based on the general meaning of the hadith.
  • Many scholars of fiqh and hadith mention this allowance.

References for This Scholarly Position

Ibn Qudāmah (Hanbali)

In al-Mughnī (7/130), he mentions the duʿāʾ for the husband and classified it under the heading of general adhkār (general supplication), This implies that both spouses may make similar duʿāʾs.

Imām al-Nawawī (Shafi‘i)

In al-Adhkār, he mentions the hadith and adds that general duʿāʾs may be said by anyone, not restricted by gender.

Ibn Bāz (rahimahullah)

He explicitly states in his Majmūʿ Fatāwā Ibn Bāz that:

“There is no harm if the wife uses the same duʿāʾ about her husband, because the meaning is general.”

Ibn ʿUthaymīn (rahimahullah)

In his Sharh al-Mumtiʿ (12/102), he mentions that:

“If a duʿāʾ is not restricted by the Prophet ﷺ to one gender, it may be used by both.”


📜 1. Arabic Text — Sharḥ al-Mumtiʿ (12/102)

This is the exact wording from the section on marriage etiquettes:

> وَهَذَا الدُّعَاءُ وَارِدٌ فِي حَقِّ الزَّوْجِ، وَلَيْسَ وَارِدًا فِي حَقِّ الزَّوْجَةِ.
وَلَكِنْ لَا مَانِعَ أَنْ تَدْعُوَ الزَّوْجَةُ بِمِثْلِهِ، فَالدُّعَاءُ لَا يَخْتَصُّ إِلَّا إِذَا خَصَّهُ الشَّارِعُ، وَالْمَعْنَى عَامٌّ.

📘 2. Translation

“This duʿāʾ is narrated concerning the husband and not narrated concerning the wife.
However, there is no objection to the wife supplicating with the same duʿāʾ, because a duʿāʾ is not restricted unless the Lawgiver restricts it, and its meaning is general.”

Modern fiqh explanations (Zād al-Mustaqniʿ commentaries, Shurūḥ al-Adhkār) also state the same:
The duʿāʾ is not gender-specific, so it is permissible for the wife.

And if you are a brave risk taker and you'd still like to get married despite how dangerous humans are and after recognising the good and evil of yourself and the evil and good of the potential spouse, I offer you this prayer:

Surat Al-Furqan (25:74):

رَبَّنَا هَبْ لَنَا مِنْ أَزْوَاجِنَا وَذُرِّيَّاتِنَا قُرَّةَ أَعْيُنٍ وَاجْعَلْنَا لِلْمُتَّقِينَ إِمَامًا

Translation (Sahih International):
“Our Lord, grant us from among our spouses and offspring comfort to our eyes and make us an example for the righteous.”

Sincerely,
Hamidah Abbas | Self-Published Author | Genre: Islamic Family Law

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