We are not having the right conversations about Polygamy in Islam

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BismiLLAH AlhamduliLLAH 


We Are Not Having the Right Conversation About Polygamy

We are not having the right conversation about polygamy—and it is destroying this Ummah.

We should not be centering the conversation on how a wife is supposed to react after her husband marries another wife. That framing is already dishonest. It assumes inevitability. It assumes she had no say. It assumes the matter was decided over her, not with her.

That is not the Islamic position.

What the Companions Actually Agreed Upon

In Al-Mughnī, Volume 9, page 483, it is clearly stated that the Companions of the Prophet ﷺ had a consensus that a woman may decide not to be in a polygamous marriage.

Yes—a Muslim woman can decide not to be in polygamy.

This is no different from the well-known ruling that although Muslim men are permitted to marry Christian women, a Christian woman still has the right to refuse.

Permission for a man does not eliminate choice for a woman.

Permission Is Not Compulsion

Muslim men are permitted to marry up to four wives.
That permission does not mean a Muslim woman loses her agency.

Islam does not turn women into passive recipients of men’s decisions.

The Companions:

  • Married Christian women
  • Practiced polygamy
  • Still unanimously agreed that a Christian woman could say no
  • And unanimously agreed that a Muslim woman could say no to polygamy

This is not complicated theology.
This is not a fringe opinion.
This is classical Islamic consensus.

So Why Are We Lying?

Why are we not speaking the truth?

Why has polygamy been discussed so dishonestly that Muslim women now believe it is obligatory for them to endure polygamy if their husbands wake up one day and spring it on them?

Why are Islamic scholars silent on this point?

Why are brothers repeating half-truths?

Fear Allah. Stop Hoarding Knowledge.

Islamic scholars and brothers should fear ALLAH.

Lying by omission is still lying.
Withholding knowledge is betrayal.

Stop hoarding what the Companions made clear.
Stop presenting male permissions as female obligations.
Stop confusing allowance with compulsion.

Spread knowledge in the name of ALLAH, not culture, ego, or male convenience.

Dear Sincere Seekers,

I hope for the day that you will realise that they know the truth. They have just kept it away from you deliberately.

They know you hurt.

They just don't care!

So revive the truth and do not be afraid of them.

They have done “10 billion good”.

But they are humans. Incapable of perfection. As they have been designed as inevitable sinners.

On this matter of polygamy, they have commited the sin of hiding the truth because their loyalty is to their desires before the truth that the companions of the Messenger ﷺ understood.

Refuse to worship them.

They are humans. They are sinners.

On the day of resurrection, when your name is called, none of them will answer for you.

The fact that you don't know one of a million of what they know doesn't mean you don't have to use your brain.

If you don't need a brain, Almighty ALLAH wouldn't have given you one.

A math professor can make basic arithmetic mistake.

Again, if you don't need a brain, Almighty ALLAH wouldn't have given you one!

Take only ALLAH as THE-GOD and no one else.

Almighty ALLAH said: “They take their rabbis and their monks for their lords apart from Allah…” - Qur'an 9:31

The Prophet ﷺ told us how you can take a scholar as ALLAH in a Hadith Narrated by  'Adi bin Hatim in Jami` at-Tirmidhi 3095 classed as Hasan by al:Albani, The Prophet ﷺ said about this verse: “'As for them, they did not worship them, but when they made something lawful for them, they considered it lawful, and when they made something unlawful for them, they considered it unlawful.'"

Respect the people of knowledge. But use your brain also. And most importantly, seek guidance from ALLAH so that HE (The Most High) can send you the right people and resources.

If you have a brain, you must use it so that you can realise the truth for what it is!

The truth is simple.
And it has always been there.

Sincerely,

Your sister in Islam,
Hamidah

Author of Polygamy Ijma’a (free)

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